Thursday, December 29, 2011

11 Things I learned in 2011

2011 was a trying year.  It started out with me climbing up on a chair in a cowboy bar and trying to give a deer head some champagne.  It just got worse from there.  I'll admit that I'm glad it's over.  But, I did learn a few things:

1.) Astrology is shit.  Just because you're a Rabbit in the Chinese Zodiac and it's the Year of the Rabbit, does not mean it's your year.

2.) Don't buy a Groupon for Spinning classes if you're mortally afraid of Spinning classes.

3.) If the dog keeps getting into food in the front of the house, a good idea might be to put him in the back of the house when you leave instead of the front.

4.) You're not the best traveler in the universe.  Maybe don't go to Texas three times in a month.

5.) The only thing you need on an airplane is a good book and some good music on your iPhone.  Take the rest of that heavy stuff out of your big ass carry-on.

6.) Going to a concert by yourself is fun.  Do this more often.

7.) Speaking of concerts, you're getting old.  You need to bring earplugs if you want to hear for the two days after the show.

8.) Twitter is fun but addictive.  Approach with caution.

9.) You can vacation in Hawaii without getting a tan.  Sunscreen = good.  Skin cancer = bad.

10.) Research where your money is going.  That dress you just bought might be helping to fund a cause you abhor.

11.) Families can be a total pain in the ass. The family drama of 2011 was unparalleled.  But, you have to be patient with them because you love them and because next year you might be the pain in the ass.

Hope your 2011 was as educational as mine.  And, here's to 2012.  Cheers!

*photo by Crystal Pistol.